Just to get everybody in a school frame of mind—a short quiz.

(Disclaimer: These questions have been developed from the common sense standards of child development and bear no intended resemblance to the new National Common Core Curriculum Standards or any other state or federal standards currently mandated for implementation in education.)

1. Your child is excited to go back to school because:

a. They are bored

b. They will get to see their friends everyday

c. They get new clothes and neat school stuff

d. They are looking forward to a fresh start with a new teacher

e. Some of the above

f. All of the above

g. None of the above

2. Your child is scared and worried about going back to school because:

a. They don’t like school

b. They don’t have many friends at school and none of those friends are in their new class

c. They don’t like dressing up and are not likely to

d. They’ve heard all about their new teacher

e. Some of the above

f. All of the above

g. None of the above

3. You are glad your child is going back to school because:

a. You miss packing lunches

b. You are excited about the school your child attends and love the letter your child received from the teacher welcoming them back

c. You’re going back to school too and need time to do the homework

d. Frankly, you need a break

e. Some of the above

f. None of the above

4. You are worried about your child going back to school because:

a. It’s a brand new school and you don’t know much about it

b. This is your child’s third school in five years and your child is shy and uncertain

c. Your child was picked on in school last year and you’re not sure how to approach this year’s teacher

d. You had trouble learning in school and see your child having similar issues

e. Some of the above

f. None of the above

The truth of the matter . . .

The beginning of every school year is a major transition point in family life. No matter how you answered the quiz, there is a mix of anxiety and excitement in children and in you (and, of course, their teachers.)

Here are a few simple suggestions that might help:

1. Establish your getting-ready-for-school routines a few days before school actually begins

a. Rein in bedtime

b. Rein in TV and cyberspace

c. Decide on school morning responsibilities at home; practice them the day before school to see if they “fit” in the time allotted—wake your child up the day before school at the appointed hour and practice going through your routines. Then maybe take them for a ride by the school or for a special final-day-of-summer family activity if you can. If not, when you get home from work the day before school, go over the next morning’s routines.

2. Try not to leave getting school supplies until the very last minute, and follow the teacher’s suggested list.

Don’t load your child up with extras. You can save those for nice surprises later in the year.

3. If you can find the time, don’t wait to meet your child’s teacher until Open House.

On day one, though, just say hello. Your child’s teacher isn’t necessarily going to remember you in the sea of new faces. Stop by in a week or so to introduce yourself in the morning or at dismissal time. Even a minute or two with the teacher in these circumstances will give you a chance to hear how your child is adjusting.

4. Once the first few days of school have passed, try to stop asking your child, “How was school today?” or “What did you do in school today?”

Kids already have ready answers to those questions: “Fine.” and “Nothing.” Try specifics, like: “Hey, what were kids playing out on the playground today?” or “Tell me something that made you laugh in school today” or “Can you tell me something the teacher said today—something you’d never known before?”

5. Use bedtime as a time to listen carefully to what your child tells you about school.

Try to make time for this in your evening routine, especially in the first month of school. Bedtime is often a time when children feel most at ease about telling you what’s really going on.

I hope each of your children will have a wonderful beginning-of-school this year—and I hope you’ll write and let me know how it goes!