Closer to teenagers than middle childhood, the twelves, too, are still tweeners. Twelves have enormous positive energy for both independent and group endeavors, whether at school, in sports, or in after-school activities such as dance, gymnastics, martial arts, chess, cooking, or crafts. This is a great age for camp, whether day or residential. More mature twelves are even sometimes chosen for part-time counselor-in-training (CIT) experiences in some camp settings.

Twelves generally demonstrate confidence and friendliness in their approach and responses to adults outside the home. They are eager to grow in their skill competencies, academic or otherwise. They get deeply invested in  project-based or service learning and can develop meaningful relationships with people outside their core peer group. Gregarious is a word well suited to twelve.

In school, twelve-year-olds make wonderful one-to-one tutors for younger children or helpers in preschool or kindergarten. Even boys at this age are known to let their guard down enough to enjoy spending time with babies and toddlers in social settings, so long as doing so is their idea.

Democracy is important to twelve-year-olds. They thrive with their first forays into student government or on a social committee or running a school store or enterprise, helping in the school office, being in charge of daily announcements over the loud speaker, producing a TV show for closed circuit broadcast, being in charge of All School Meetings, serving as peer mediators, being in plays and musical productions, or playing in the band. Whether the school structure is K–6 or middle school, the more responsibility twelve-year-olds are given, the better they generally do academically and socially. Many children demonstrate amazing leadership potential at this age.

Twelve is an age of rite of passage, often from elementary school to middle school , and it’s the age in many cultures and religions associated with the transition from childhood to young adulthood. Ceremonies such as Bar and Bat Mitzvahs, confirmations, and social traditions carry great significance for children at this age. Schools do well to formalize the leaving of sixth grade with traditions and recognition of the passage it represents.

At home, like eleven-year-olds, twelves may seem to revert to younger and “childish” ways of behaving. This may be displayed as moodiness, sullenness, monosyllabic responses or grunts, short tempers or tears. Remember, home is where the heart is, in this case, young and fragile and needing refuge from the world where they are trying to place and negotiate their unfolding identity and personality.

At home, an enormous amount of time is spent in front of the mirror as twelves reflect on who they are becoming. Every person at home as well as the house itself, especially their sacred room or private space, helps serve as a metaphoric mirror as well, reflecting family values, traditions, and culture that they carry with them daily to their expanding horizons.

Many of the most cherished photos in any family album after baby pictures come from this age taken at special family events, rites of passage and school events or graduation from elementary school. Keep your camera handy.